01/17/2006: From the "Unusual Snitches" department.....
Rule One: if you're going to have an affair, and if you're going to "entertain" your lover in the flat that you share with your significant other (who is not the person you're having the affair with), get rid of the fucking parrot, first (or at least put it somewhere out of earshot).
LONDON, England -- A computer programmer found out his girlfriend was having an affair when his pet parrot kept repeating her lover's name, British media reported Tuesday.Premptive strike: Yes, this does smell of "urban legend" (save that there's a lot more detail about the names and other facts concerning the principals than most urban legends do); if anyone has evidence that it is a legend please feel free to leave a comment detailing it.
The African grey parrot kept squawking "I love you, Gary" as his owner, Chris Taylor, sat with girlfriend Suzy Collins on the sofa of their shared flat in Leeds, northern England.
But when Taylor saw Collins's embarrassed reaction, he realized she had been having an affair -- meeting her lover in the flat whilst Ziggy looked on, the UK's Press Association reported.
Ziggy even mimicked Collins's voice each time she answered her telephone, calling out "Hiya Gary," according to newspaper reports.
Call-center worker Collins, 25, admitted the four-month affair with a colleague called Gary to her boyfriend and left the flat she had shared with Taylor, 30, for a year.
Taylor said he had also been forced to part with Ziggy after the bird continued to call out Gary's name and refused to stop squawking the phrases in his ex-girlfriend's voice, media reports said.
"I wasn't sorry to see the back of Suzy after what she did, but it really broke my heart to let Ziggy go," he said.
"I love him to bits and I really miss having him around, but it was torture hearing him repeat that name over and over again.
"I still can't believe he's gone. I know I'll get over Suzy, but I don't think I'll ever get over Ziggy."
But what's making me giggle this morning is that it reminds me of a classic "Far Side" cartoon: a group of obvious gangsters are huddled around a table in a room containing a caged parrot. The leader of the gang is addressing his minions: "Ok...just so we don't forget it, lets repeat the address of our new hideout about one hundred times."
Len on 01.17.06 @ 09:20 AM CST