Dark Bilious Vapors

But how could I deny that I possess these hands and this body, and withal escape being classed with persons in a state of insanity, whose brains are so disordered and clouded by dark bilious vapors....
--Rene Descartes, Meditations on First Philosophy: Meditation I

Home » Archives » October 2004 » Gem o'the Day, bonus edition:

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10/24/2004: Gem o'the Day, bonus edition:

The caterwalling and bullshit from Yankee fans has been quite amusing. You would think that the Brooklyn Bridge fell into the East River the way the Yankee fans are reacting. You would think Yankee Stadium was a mass grave of dead puppies.

See, Yankee fans have, like many Bush supporters, the delusion that they are far more popular than they really are.

What they seem not to get is this: EVERYBODY HATES THE YANKEES.

No one else likes them. No one. No Orioles fan says "You know, they aren't that bad". No, from Oakland to Shea Stadium, everyone hates the fucking Yankees. No one roots for them, no one admires them, they detest them.

Every year, fistfights between Yankee and Mets fans are covered up by the media, despite 300 arrests a couple of years ago.

I was coming home from the supermarket when a guy, who I know is a Mets fan, had a nice sign in his window: Yankees suck.

The problem is that the newspapers are so far up Steinbrenner's ass that if he shits, Lachlan Murdoch has to wash his hair and Mort Zuckerman needs a shower. Every goddamn baseball promotion is about the Yankees as if their fans are static. There are a lot of front runners who wear Yankee gear when the Yankees win and then switch to the Mets when
they win.

The local papers act like it's a fucking tragedy when the most hated team in sports loses, when in reality, most of America was beset with joy. There is no play called Damn Redsox. Hell, many in New York were besides themselves with glee that the Yankees choked like a chihuahua on a chicken bone.

The Yankees care about the Yankees and that's it. They do one big charity event a year, while the Mets do several. It was the Mets who did Widows and Orphans at Shea, who do Christmas visits to hospitals. Yet, everytime Steinbrenner farts, it's like he emitted perfume from his ass, even as they rail against them.

Jerry Seinfeld probably did the best thing a Yankee hater could do, mock them from the inside. The Yankees still hate that show. And of course, Seinfeld is a Mets fan.

See, Yankee fans think their precious team of mercenaries is beloved by all. That delusion, like the one Bush supporters have about his popularity, is just that. Like Bush, the Yankees are far more hated than liked.

It may slowly dawn on them that America rejoiced at their donkey dick choke.

Oh yeah, fuck the fucking Yankees.
--Steve Gilliard

Len on 10.24.04 @ 08:17 PM CST

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