08/10/2004: Stupid eBay Auctions Department:
Napkin with sweat from Ambassador Alan Keyes' forehead
Blotted from Keyes' brow at Senate announcement 8-8-04
Bidding currently at $465.00
Jeeeeeezzzzzzuuuusssss!!!!!!! It's only Alan Keyes, fergawdsakes. Not like it's a napkin that's mopped Elvis's forehead.
[Which brings back memories. I used to be an usher back in the heyday of St. Louis's great Henry W. Kiel Auditorium, where I was "fortunate" enough to work an Elvis concert, and during a break in Elvis's show Colonel Tom Parker hisownself came out and hawked silk scarves which, he claimed, had mopped the sweat off Elvis's own brow. And the ladies ate that shit up....]
Anyway, if Keyes's napkin is a tad pricey for you, go put in a bid on Big Stupid Tommy's napkin. I'm sure in a few years you'll be able to auction it off for quite a handsome return on your investment (considering that the bidding is up the the astronomical height of $0.60 USD right now, that should be fairly easy to accomplish).
UPDATE (8/11/04): As of about noon or so today (actually much earlier, I'm sure since Big Stupid Tommy updated it yesterday), eBay yanked this auction for unexplained reasons.
Len on 08.10.04 @ 08:33 AM CST